In which my mojo returns and I make ganache with Green & Black’s
So as you know, I kinda lost my blogging mojo.
It all started to really bug me. I mean, what am I exactly? A foodie blogger? In which case, should I concentrate on food, and not talk so much arse? Or am I a ‘mummy blogger’ (how I hate the term)? A foodie mummy blogger? A foodie blogger who’s also a mummy? A doggy blogger? A foodie doggy mummy blogger? A blogging mummy foodie… er… dogger?
I think I’m kind of ‘none of the above’, really. I’m a blogger who happens to be a mother of two ridiculously fantastic and hilariously funny boys of whom I’m immensely proud. And I’m a foodie. But I’m also a wife, a very occasional journalist (One article this year so far, count it: one.), and a daughter of quite the most spectacularly mental parents you could wish for. I write about food, yes, and I write about kids, but then I write about all sorts of old rubbish besides those two things and an awful lot more besides: greyhounds, chickens, ‘bollocks’ pies, sexual gymnastics…
So I decided I wouldn’t pigeonhole myself. I would let my verbal vomit run free. I would practice ‘no holds barred’ blogging – ‘blogging sans frontieres’, if you would. And do you know what? My mojo came back.
The return of the missing mojo was also partly due to the lovely chaps at Green & Black’s sending me a mahoosive parcel of chocolate. I mean, whose mojo could remain missing when surrounded by about ten different flavours of the most fabulous chocolate in the world?
And seeing as we’ve got the ginormous Cupcake Challenge in the offing, I thought I’d say a few words about chocolate and a few more about ganache:
A few words about chocolate
Chocolate, especially decent chocolate like Green and Black’s needs gentle treatment. That means that melting it in the microwave is a bit of a no no in my book, as the microwave can create hotspots and burn the chocolate or turn it grainy. The best way is to place it in a heatproof bowl over a saucepan of hot water. Make sure the water isn’t touching the bottom of the bowl, and when the water starts to bubble, just turn it off and allow the chocolate to melt gently. I’m a bit anal, but I don’t like to stir until it’s completely melted:
Furthermore, there’s no point in bunging in a bar of Cadbury’s Dairy Milk (as nice as it is) – you need something good quality with a high cocoa content, and for cooking, good cocoa butter content will make for easier melting. I tried Green and Black’s Milk Cook’s Chocolate (one of many in my stash) and was really pleased with the result: melted easily? Check. Nice milky taste? Check. No hint of graininess? Check. Furthermore, each little square weighs exactly 5g. Magic!
A few more about ganache:
There’s some kind of ridiculous snobbery about ganache. I mean, just because it’s got a poncy French name it doesn’t mean it has to be poncy itself: it’s just cream and chocolate for goodness’ sake. If you make it runny you can pour it over things as a glaze, or if you make it stiffer you can make truffles, you can chill it and whip it and then pipe it on things too, but it’s still just chocolate and cream.
Anyhoo, so just whisk your cream into your melted chocolate until you get the required consistency (as above), then pour or spread over your cake as required. For piping, bung it in the fridge, then give it a whisk before filling your piping bag.
Et voila. Ganache. Magnifique, n’est-ce pas?
(Oh and these little beauties are red velvet cupcakes, taken from an awesomely, beautiful new book called ‘Eat Me’ by Xanthe Milton which is due to be published on Mar 4th – and guess who’s getting a review copy?!)
English Grandma’s special spiced rum and raisin brownies
So English Grandma was visiting last week. It was her birthday and as usual here at English Towers, this meant that the birthday person had the honour of choosing their own cake. Except of course English Grandma didn’t really want a cake, in fact, didn’t really want to be reminded that she was 70 at all. It’s a great age, though, I reckon. It’s the same age as Raquel Welch (about whom the term ‘looks good for her age’ equates to calling the north pole ‘a bit nippy’) and Ralph Lauren, for goodness sake, who’s classier than Ralph?
Plus, there are so many bonuses to being 70: you can be as outspoken as you like, wear odd socks, shave your dog’s hair into weird patterns, use beer towels for curtains (Hubby actually had an aunt that did that) or walk around with your hair sticking up like Fr Jack out of Father Ted, because, let’s face it, who’s going to say anything to you about it? And even if they do, you can club them with your handbag and get away with it. Bonus.
Anyhoo, digressing. So I had to think of a nice dessert which would please the chisellers, who insist on cake at birthdays (what child doesn’t) and be unbirthdaycakey enough to please the mother. I know she likes rum and raisin and I toyed with the idea of rum and raisin ice cream, but then the cake-ish issue reared its ugly head again. ‘I know!’, said #2,’ birthday brownies!’. Fabulous. And for an added twist, I thought I’d get the rum and raisins in there too. Here goes, then:
3 tbsp rum (I used Morgan’s Spiced Rum)
Couple of handfuls (about 50g) raisins or sultanas
200g dark chocolate (this one was from Lidl and had a very pleasing ‘snap’ to it)
170g butter (salted is best with chocolate, or add a pinch of salt)
3 eggs
225g caster sugar
110g plain flour
1/2 tsp ground mixed spice
So first preheat the oven to 180/gas4 and plop the raisins into the rum to soak. Melt the butter and the chocolate in a bain-marie (yes, I know you know, but some people don’t, so I still have to point out that we’re talking about a heatproof bowl over a saucepan of simmering water, not touching the bottom of the bowl):
When the butter and chocolate start to melt, turn the heat off and let it melt gently using the residual heat. When it’s all melted together, put it to one side to cool slightly.
Meanwhile, take out your Very Special Anniversary KitchenAid (or a whisk and a bowl, if you’re not as lucky as me). Crack in the eggs (if you don’t have a small red chicken with an attitude problem who lays eggs that are approximately half her body weight, don’t worry, they sell eggs in Tesco too)…
…and whizz them together with the sugar until they’re nice and fluffy:
I’d just like to point out that this is a complete excuse to use the KitchenAid as I’ve actually just mixed the eggs and sugar with a fork before now, and it comes out exactly the same. Still…
Fold the flour and mixed spice in to the eggy sugary mixture - nice and gently because (altogether now): working the gluten in the flour too much will make the end result tough:
…and finally, stir in the melted chocolate and butter and the rum and raisins:
Put some bake-o-glide or greaseproof paper in the bottom of a lasagne tin, pour the mixture in:
… and bake for about 35 minutes until the top is all cracky and shiny, but the inside is still retaining a hint of gooeyness.
Leave to cool slightly.
Fight off children, reminding them that this recipe contains alcohol and is therefore for the over 18s only, and serve with a flourish, or some vanilla ice cream, to 70 (shhh) year old birthday girl.
Oh, and absolutely no singing of ‘happy birthday’, okay? She might hit you with her handbag.
Happy (belated) birthday, Mum!
The perfect chocolate cupcake
So this week is National Cupcake Week (as if we needed an excuse to eat cupcakes anyway), so I thought we’d go ‘back to basics’ today with a ressup for the perfect deeply darkly chocolatey cupcake with added… (you can get this)… chocolate! ‘Tis dead easy and a thing of beauty. Brace yourselves, then:
For the cupcakes, you’ll need:
200g bar dark chocolate (something with high cocoa solids is best) – remember only half is for the cupcake mix, the other half is for the ganache.
170g butter, softened
170g caster sugar
3 eggs (fresh from the chicken, preferably, but if not, room temperature is better than straight from the fridge)
115g self raising flour
55g cocoa powder
Double cream
First, then, preheat the oven to 180/gas 4. Snap the chocky into squares and melt it in a heatproof bowl over a saucepan of barely simmering water (bain marie, blah blah).
Leave it aside to cool slightly while you beat together the butter and sugar until they’re really light and fluffy (did I mention I have a shiny new KitchenAid to perform this task? Yes? Oh okay then).
Now add in the eggs one at a time, beating really well after each addition.
Sieve the flour and cocoa into a bowl and fold them gently into the mixture.
Now, grab your melted chocolate and pour HALF of it into the mixture. Stir briefly to combine.
Dollop into paper muffin cups in a 12-hole muffin tray, or if you’re really greedy and want to make MASSIVE cupcakes, then just make 8 and stuff them very full.
Bake them for about 15/20 minutes (the bigger ones will take longer) or until the centre springs back up when you push it with your finger. Leave them to cool on a wire rack.
Now, for the ganache, take the rest of your melted chocolate, place it into your shiny new KitchenAid (oh yes, okay, you can use a bowl and a whisk if you don’t have one) and whizz whilst gently pouring in just a slosh of double cream. Don’t go mad – you need it thick enough to pile lusciously on top of your chocolatey cupcakes:
Finally, lock the door, take your cupcakes and sit in the corner of the kitchen, stuffing them into your face in a slightly deranged manner. Or if you’re really mental I suppose you could even share them.
Fetch the defibrillator! Double chocolate cookie dough brownies
So my lovely friend, fellow Disney 7 adventurer and blogger, Laura, kind of acts like my chocolate pimp – any sign of any chocolate action anywhere on the web and she’s all over it – it’s gatherered up and sent to me before I can blink. I like this. Which is why Laura is my friend.
Here, then, is Laura’s latest discovery – sniffed bloodhound-like from the bowels of the interweb and delivered to me ready to be fiddled with and muddled with and twiddled with and delivered to you, sparkly, new and fattening. Aren’t you lucky? Many thanks to the incredibly clever lady at One Ordinary Day for sharing this one.
Double Chocolate Cookie Dough Brownies
First, then, you need to make some brownies, for which you need my double, triple, quadruple, tested brownie recipe:
200g bar dark chocolate
170g butter
3 eggs
225g caster sugar
110g plain flour
110g nuts if you want, or chocolate chips, or nothing – see if I care…
So melt the butter and chocolat in a bain-marie (bowl over saucepan of just simmering water – not letting bottom of bowl come into contact with water – you know the drill). Turn the water off when it’s just bubbling and stir the mixture gently until it’s combined. Take it off the heat and allow it to cool to blood temperature (one doesn’t want extra scrambled eggy bits in one’s brownie, trust me).
Meanwhile, whisk the eggs and sugar together. I don’t put raising agent in my brownie as I guess they’re supposed to be quite fudgy and heavy, but I whisk the eggs and sugar to add a few bubbles. Don’t if you don’t want to – it’s just me being picky.
Now, pour in your chocky/butter mixture, stir until combined then bung in the flour and the whatever else you’re using: cherries/chocolate chips/nuts, etc. Or nothing.
Line a lasagne tin or baking tin with greaseproof (or have bits of bake-o-glide cleverly cut into the right shape, if you’re really anal about it *cough*), pour in the mixture and bake for about 35 minutes at 180/gas 4 until the top is shiny and cracked but the middle is still dense and squidgy. Leave to cool.
Now, for the cookie dough mixture:
130g butter, softened
130g muscovado sugar
100g caster sugar
4 tbsp milk
1 tsp vanilla extract
100g dark chocolate, chopped (or chocolate chips)
200g plain flour
So whizz up the butter and sugars with the electric whisk, add in the milk and vanilla and whizz some more. Stir in the flour (it seems a lot, but it all goes in eventually). Finally, stir in the chocolate chips. Spread over the top of your cooled brownie and refrigerate.
Finally, to make sure your guests really suffer a coronary, melt another 100g of chocolate and drizzle it all over the top. Chill to finish. Serve in very small pieces as this is very, very rich indeed. Oops, sorry, I just drooled a little on the keyboard, let me get that…
Dark chocolate and peanut butter brownies
The little man’s school doesn’t allow any form of pre-packed sweets or snacks in their packed lunches. That means no crisps, no sweeties and absolutely no chocolate bars. Now I’m not an ogre, and while a healthy sandwich, some carrot sticks and an apple might be the way to go, it’s a bit bloody boring, frankly. So I like to slip in a small something to perk up his lunch a little – on the understanding that all the healthy stuff has to be eaten first, obviously. Home-made snackage is, happily, completely acceptable, so my current obsession is tray bakes, muffins, biscuits and flapjacks – anything to enliven the tupperware, as it were.
This one turned out pretty well, and, as I explained to him, peanut butter is good for you too, which makes this practically a health food (and if he’s not looking, I slip in some finely chopped dates, which add a nice toffee taste as well as being good for him):
175g dark chocolate
100g butter
70g crunchy peanut butter
2 eggs
170g caster sugar
110g plain flour
Preheat the oven to gas 4/180 degrees. Melt together the chocolate, butter and peanut butter in a bain marie (or a heatproof bowl over a saucepan of simmering water):
Remember not to let the water touch the bottom of the bowl – you want it all to melt very gently. Turn off the heat as soon as it’s starting to melt and continue to stir occasionally, letting the residual heat melt everything together.
Meanwhile, whisk the eggs and sugar together (spiky hair optional):
When it’s really light and fluffy, sieve in the flour and fold gently through:
Now pour in your melted butter, chocolate and peanut butter mixture and stir gently until just combined, then pour into a baking tin:
Pop it into the oven and bake for about 25 minutes, until even and slightly cracked on top. Remember you want to retain some squish in the middle. When cool, cut into squares and store in an airtight container, ready to enliven the lunchbox (or if you’re feeling all posh, serve warm with whipped cream). I guess you could say they’re nutty but nice. Ahaha.
In other news, EnglishGrandma is a-visiting, and last night I tried out the recipe that I’m going to co-post with Curious Wines (you’re going to love it – they’re going to choose wines for us to complement one of my recipes). Trouble is, after spending a whole afternoon toiling over oven-roasted butternut squash risotto, and chicken breasts stuffed with a sage, apple and red onion stuffing, taking step-by-step photos of the whole process, my camera promptly turned itself off and I lost every single photo. Not. Happy. Still, it came out well. I’ll just have to repeat the whole thing and photograph it all over again. Tsk.
Ooh and in other other news, I’m a Disney Blu-Ray Ambassador! Yay! Lots of film reviews coming your way, including one each from the English Smalls. Be afraid.
Oaty chocolate chip cookies: not a diet option, admittedly
Ah, the Easter hols. Don’t you just love them? Being a total heathen, I’m not particularly interested in the religious stuff, but hey, copious amounts of chocolate, fluffy bunnies and not having to get up to take the kids to school? Bring it on. This morning, then, found me pottering in the kitchen and doing some severe damage to my chocolate chip cookie recipe. I know, I love a fiddle. I just can’t help myself. Actually I think this one’s much better than my original - posted back in 2006 (can you believe that?), but see what you think:
125g butter
150g brown sugar
1 egg
1 tsp vanilla extract
150g flour
50g oats
100g chocolate, chopped
So cream the butter, then add the sugar and beat together until it’s really light. Add the egg and vanilla and beat again until pale and fluffy. Stir in the flour until it’s just combined, then add the oats and chopped chocolate:
Dollop the mixture in spoonfuls onto a baking tray. I used an ice cream scoop to make really massive cookies, but if you’re not such a disgustingly greedy pig, you could make smaller ones.
Bake at 180/gas 4 for about 10-12 minutes. Don’t overcook them as you want them really lovely and soft in the middle. Serve while still warm with a nice cup of tea.
Oh, and while we’re on the subject of yummy stuff, pop over to the Daily Spud’s gaff, and check out her amazing sticky toffee pudding recipe - try it and die of happiness. Here’s my attempt, which was happily scoffed on Sunday:
There. If I haven’t succeeded in gumming up your arteries completely by now, I must be damned close. Enjoy!
Chocolate chip whiteys or white chocolate brownies, or blondies…
My poor Ma’s flight was delayed until 11pm on Friday. How desperate is that? Nobody needs to spend 5 hours adrift at Dublin Airport, it’s just not fair. The only thing to do there is drink and buy vast amounts of overpriced cosmetics. Oh, hang on though, that sounds like quite good fun. Still, she’s home now and we’re all more or less returning to normal (by normal, I mean our alcohol consumption has levelled out and the pink meringue pie is finally finished), although the children are flush with cash and chocolate, but then that’s usual after a visit from Grandma.
In other news, the cookery book I worked on as recipe tester and general skivvy has finally been published and I got my sparkly new copy in the post, complete with my name in it! And okay, whilst it’s not quite as good as having your own cook book published, some of the recipes in there are mine, so I’m still rather pleased. Although in a typically spectacular piece of Frank Spenceresque cack-handedness, I then tipped a bottle of kitchen cleaner all over it without noticing and had to spend a ridiculously long time unsticking all the pages, but honestly, I’ve come to expect nothing less from myself.
Back in the kitchen, then, to knock up these little beauties. I think they’re really supposed to be called ‘blondies’ but in this house they’re called whiteys:
225g white chocolate (make sure it’s a nice one, although I’m sure making it with Milky Bar wouldn’t kill you)
170g butter
3 eggs
225g caster sugar
110g plain flour
50 chopped dark chocolate
Melt the white chocolate and the butter in a bowl over a saucepan of simmering water, making sure the bottom doesn’t touch the water (bain marie, you knew that though, blah blah):
In another bowl, mix up the eggs and sugar – don’t whisk or anything, but make sure they’re well combined. Add in the melted chocolate mixture, then the flour and finally the dark chocolate chunks:
Tip into a greased and lined rectangular tin (you really must get some bake-o-glide, it’s fab) and bake for about 30 - 35 minutes. You don’t get quite the same shiny, cracked effect as with the dark chocolate brownies, and the dark chocolate chunks do sink to the bottom, but the result has a slightly lighter, chewier effect and is rather pleasing. Oh, and if you’re not totally fruit-phobic like #2, these would be exceptionally nice with a handful of raspberries instead of the dark chocolate. It’s a really nice, fool-proof recipe, this one. In fact, if I ever write my own recipe book, I’ll put this one in it. And I’ll keep it well away from the kitchen cleaner too.
Chocolate meringue muffins
So, chocolate muffins, then. I make them more times than I care to admit to and, as a dabbler, tend to add at least one extra little something: some chopped white chocolate, maybe, or some orange zest… dried cherries are surprisingly nice… sometimes I’ll decorate them with ganache, or just melted chocolate, and sometimes I just leave them alone and unadorned. This version came about after making muffins and wishing there was something else I could pipe onto them apart from buttercream, which I love, but Hubby detests. So first up for the muffins, you’ll need:
170g butter, softened
170g caster sugar
3 eggs
115g self raising flour
55g cocoa powder
So preheat the oven to 180/gas 4 and beat together the butter and sugar until they’re really light and fluffy. Add in the eggs one at a time, beating really well after each addition, then sieve the flour and cocoa into the bowl and fold them in gently. If the mixture’s a bit thick, add a slosh of milk.
Put paper muffin cups into the holes of a muffin tray and put a tablespoon of the mixture into each one (it should make about 12). Bake them for about 15/20 minutes until the centre springs back up when you push it with your finger. Leave them to cool on a wire rack:
Now, get cracking on the meringue:
Take a really clean bowl and whisk up two egg whites until they’re really stiff (yes, yes, you can do the ‘holding the bowl over someone’s head’ thing if you like). Now whisk in 115g of caster sugar one tablespoon at a time, whisking really well between each spoonful until the meringue is thick and glossy.
Now comes the fun bit. Preheat the grill to medium and then you can just dollop the meringue on top of the muffins, or you can crack open the piping kit (yay!) and pipe little swirls of meringue over the muffins. Once they’ve been piped, it’s your prerogative as Head Chef to pipe the rest of the meringue straight into your mouth. Now just let them heat gently under the grill until they’re kind of golden with a few darker tips – watch them carefully as they burn really easily. BTW: If you’re worried about eating raw eggs, you could always pipe them onto greaseproof paper on a baking tray, then bake them in a really low oven, and just stick them on top of the muffins with a spoonful of whipped cream. Yum. I was also thinking these would be lovely made without the cocoa (make up the difference with flour) and with a tsp or two of vanilla extract, then you could even add a hint of pink food colouring into the meringue – fab for a girly party.
And there you have it. Gorgeous, gooey meringue and rich chocolate cake. A mixture, I think you’ll agree, made in heaven. As I always say, there aren’t many things in this life that can’t be improved with a big dollop of meringue.
Bourbon biscuits: homemade heaven in a little chocolatey sarnie
Right, so. Enough of this doom and gloom. As self-elected President of Chocolate for Ireland, I prescribe a healthy dose of feel-good… erm… fattening stuff. Here, then, to cheer you all up, is a big fat stack of Bourbons. This is adapted from an old Mrs Beeton recipe so it must be good.
First, then, grease and line a baking sheet, or use the wondrously fantastic non-sticky stuff that is Bake-o-glide. Preheat your oven to gas 3/160, grab your Homer Simpson apron (woo hoo!) and roll up thy sleeves.
You’ll need:
100g butter
100g caster sugar
2 tbsp golden syrup
200g plain flour
30g cocoa
1 tsp bicarbonate of soda
and for the chocolate creamy stuff:
100g butter
150g icing sugar
2 tbsp cocoa
2 tsp vanilla extract
First, then, beat the hell out of the butter and sugar until it’s lovely and light and fluffy, then beat in the golden syrup (dip the spoon in boiling water first).
In a separate bowl, sieve the flour, cocoa and bicarb together :
and then carefully mix it into the butter and sugar with a fork, and then dive in with your hands. Bring it together into a slightly crumbly dough and roll it out (here’s where the Bake-o-glide comes in, you can roll it directly onto the sheet), pushing the edges straight with a knife, until you’ve got a rough rectangle about 1/2 cm thick.
Now gently cut the rectangle in half right down the middle and put it on your baking tray:
Bung it into the oven for about 15 minutes (it won’t change colour but will just feel firmer to the touch). When you take it out, gently cut each strip into fingers:
Leave them to cool while you make the creamy filling stuff by beating the butter until very soft, then carefully adding the sugar, cocoa and vanilla (watch out for low-level icing sugar clouds here). Beat it until it’s lovely and smooth and then sandwich your little bourbons together generously with the filling.
And yes, I know it’s easier to buy packet ones, but think of the satisfaction of making something better than Mr Tesco. These amounts will make around 20 biscuits (I divided my dough into two batches as my bake-o-glide wasn’t big enough). So that’s 19 for me and one for the dog, then. Result.
Chocolate fondant: gooey chocolatey yumminess
So you know how you can cook something with your eyes shut, and then the moment you invite someone round and do it, it all goes horribly wrong? The very thing happened when the Disreputable One visited once – I made the cheesecake I make successfully ALL the time, I presented it at the table with a flourish, tried to slice it and realised in horror that it was completely runny. Seriously dearest reader, you could have sucked the bloody thing through a straw. Gutted, was I.
Yesterday, then, the Lovelies came to Sunday lunch. And I decided to stick to stuff I can make well in advance, so as not to succumb to runny cheesecake syndrome. We got a fabilis chunk of Aberdeen Angus up at Enniskillen and roasted it along with some nice crispy roast potatoes (duck fat, baby), some buttery curly kale and just plain ol’ peas and carrots. I was going to do Yorkshire Puddings too, but I got a bit stuck into the Jacob’s Creek and kind of forgot. Still, it was all good.
For pudding, then, I went for apple crumble and cream, plus a chocolate fondant for the kiddlies (let’s face it, it’s MEANT to be gooey in the middle – how could you bugger it up?):
For 4 people (double it up to feed more)
115g butter
115g dark chocolate
3 eggs
35g plain flour
150g caster sugar
Preheat the oven to 200 degrees/gas 6. Butter your preferred dish (or 4 of those medium ramekin things) generously, then sprinkle with a little bit of flour.
Now in a bain-marie (heatproof bowl over saucepan of simmering water, blah blah), melt the chocolate and the butter. Meanwhile, mix together the eggs, flour and sugar. Make sure the chocolate is just melted (and no hotter than finger temp), and stir them both together. Pour into your prepared dish and put to one side. Easy. As. Pie.
Now, just when you’re clearing up the main meal, bung the dish in for about 20 mins (less for the individual ramekins – more like 15) until it’s just past the wobbly stage and looks set on the top. Don’t leave it much longer as you won’t get the delicious gooey chocolate centre.
Serve with a flourish, and a bucket of cold, cold cream. And hopefully you won’t need a straw.
