Me in one sentence
So me Ma’s here. The house has descended into giggly chaos (just how we like it). We have one of those silly conversations, trying to describe ourselves in five words, which turns into little five word sentences:
#1: ‘Absolutely perfect in every way’
Collective groan.
#2: ‘Short, annoying, young and beautiful’
We all nod.
Me: ‘that means “and” is one of your five words’
Hubby (interrupting): ‘He should be: “chocolate eating waste of space”‘
Collective snorts.
Ma: ‘Ooh! Mine should be “children spoilt while you wait”‘
Hubby: ‘past my sell by date’
We all crack up
Ma: ‘ooh, I could be: “just the one Mrs Wembley”‘
Hubby: ‘#1 could be: “I talk a good game”‘
#1: ‘Mum, you can be: “I’ll settle for the cash”‘
I aim a slap at #1′s head.
#2: ‘What’s Bert?: “all I do is sleep”‘
We like that one. Bert yawns.
Me: ‘I was thinking more like five separate words. I’d be: “blonde, affectionate, happy, kitchen goddess”. How’s that?’
#1: ‘Inaccurate’
Second slap.
Go on, then. Yourself in five words.
(delete as applicable)
Jen: Hmmm, I think that should be mine too, or maybe ‘shit why’d I say that’?
If I insert a hyphen does that make it 1 word?…or is that cheating?
Ok…Martini-drinking, animal-loving, outgoing, friendly, blonde.
P.S. How’s Bert’s nose?????
P.P.S. Said to husband last night:
Me: “Oh my God, Bert cut himself with a razor, the poor thing”
Husband: “Who the hell is Bert”?????
Ha ha!
Right…I’m sounding like weirdo stalker now…best I sign off!
#1 – Nah, I haven’t read it…
#2 – May I have more broccoli?
EM – Chicken nuggets and fries, please!
Hubbs – I don’t really watch telly…
Bertie – Rights to Life for Cats!!
Hm. I’ll have to think about it. Does ‘smart-ass’ count as one word or two?
Well, I am. Underneath the red hair dye and the attitude! LOL!
Roy: The last two just don’t go with the first three. I know you’re misunderstood, dahling, you’re a pussycat really!!!!
Jennifer: Loving the hyphenation – I’m all for bending the rules. Bert’s nose is recovering thanks, although Hubby tried his outfit on for The Big Waterford Wedding this weekend and Bert came and sniffed – and bled on – the shirt cuff. Uh oh. Weirdo stalker? Never! What would he do without all this attention!
Jen: Or for you:
‘a Merlot? No thank you’
Or for C:
‘didn’t bother placing the bet’. Hee!
Kate: Just? Just?! x
Jay: Never! My Ma did ‘short, fat, old and wrinkly’ but we wouldn’t let her have it!
Oh, and #1′s should be ‘where has my hair gone’ after his recent back-to-school shearing!!
Wee One: I’ll give you cake-lovin’, but only ‘cos it’s you.
take your pick lol
me: glass of red wine please
Nats: Perfect, sums you up very well! x
KBG: Surely not?! Hee hee x
How about:
Itchy, irritable, sweaty yet charming