So earlier this week I was up and about at some ungodly hour, puzzling as to where exactly the car park spaces were supposed to be under several inches of ice in a windswept train station car park.

Still, it got better, as when we got to Yeo Valley’s beautiful organic garden and tea rooms in Somerset, they’d got the log fire burning and tea and biccies laid out ready for us (home made chocolate and mint – very yummy indeed).  The gardens look beautiful even in the winter:

As you might know, I work with Yeo Valley Organic as an advocate, (along with Laura, who nearly missed her connecting train and managed to catch it by an ungainly sprint across the platform, hurling people out of her path as she went).  We work with them on new ideas, feeding back information from a consumer’s point of view, and basically loll around eating as much of their yogurt as possible. Yup, it’s a tough job.

This week, then, it was all about the new look.  Most of us already know that Yeo Valley’s farmers are British organic family farms, (which are more sustainable than intensive mass dairy production) but they really want to get that message across.  Let’s face it, they have SO much going for them: beautiful organically-run farms in gorgeous Somerset, the stunning organic gardens and tea rooms, amazingly committed staff and fantastic organic products too.

So in their quest to be ’100% Yeoganic’ (which is obviously much more than just ‘organic’) they’re going back to their roots, with fab new flavours, lovely new packaging and a gorgeous new website to match.  The yogurts have all had a ‘facelift’ too, with an amazing new.. erm… bacterium or something? (sorry, I was too busy eating yogurt during this bit) which is much creamier (without being ‘fattier’).

Here’s our tasting table.  You’re jealous, right?

My particular favourite was this little beauty – a limited edition flavoured with blackcurrant and a fragrant hit of elderflower.  Absolutely delicious:

There are also some brand new products, which we’re probably not supposed to tell you about, but hey, you know I’m an oversharer.  Talking of oversharing, how about these new Top Notch yogurts, with a layer of fruity conserve on the bottom.  The sticky fig and honey is TO DIE FOR:

And you can see the gorgeous new packaging for the milk and butter in the background there.  Here’s a close-up:

and here’s all the new packs of pots and the cute new children’s products (including Yeo Tubes with some fabulous cow jokes).  I think the smoothies are great for older children – they have bigger pots and more sophisticated flavours like peach and passion fruit, and mango and pineapple.  You can take the outer carton off and inside you can cut out and build a 3D cow.  I tried to bribe them into giving me one of the 3D cows, but they’re not out yet.  Boo.

Stuff to look out for:

• the new ‘Mild and Creamy  Natural’ – a lovely creamy version of Yeo Valley’s natural yoghurt. I can see this being a great substitute to cream, dolloped on apple crumble and splodged on warm chocolate brownies… mmmmm.
• new 0% fat yoghurts all thicker and creamier
• Fab new recipes including even yummier strawberry and raspberry flavours, blueberry with a hint of lime, a scrummy rhubarb flavour and a very posh raspberry and passionfruit one too.
• the Greek Style yogurts – so thick the spoon stands up in them (check out my fave: coconut)
• there may even be (shhhhhhhh!) some really creamy rice pudding in the pipeline.

All this lovely new stuff will be appearing in the shops very soon.  Last photo is probably my favourite pot of all.  The classic strawberry.  Whoever thought you could look at a pot of yogurt and think ‘wow, that’s pretty’, but it really is:

Thanks, as always, to the fabulous team at Yeo Valley, for endless tea, delicious grub, heowge amounts of yogurt, tons of laughs, and ‘Yeo Em Gee!’ those puns xx

Still in pursuit of the perfect chocolate brownie, then, I made these while my children were out making giant… erm.. appendages out of snow.  I would show you a video but they’re all disgusting and their grandparents might see.  I don’t know where they get it from.

These brownies are utterly lush and slightly more ‘grown up’ than the version I usually make (George’s chocolate brownies) but the recipe is mostly the same.  I think they benefit from being served warm as the ‘oranginess’ comes out more.

You will need:

200g dark chocolate (as dark as you dare – see below)

170g salted butter (MUST be salted – or add a pinch if using unsalted)

3 tablespoons marmalade (I used rindless for a smooth result)

3 eggs

200g soft brown sugar (caster is fine if you don’t have any)

110g plain flour

Preheat the oven to gas 4/180 degrees.

Melt the butter, chocolate and marmalade in a bain-marie (you know the drill… bowl over a saucepan of just-simmering water – don’t let the bottom of the bowl come into contact with water).  Don’t use the microwave – I’ve no idea why but melting chocolate in the microwave REALLY offends me.  Turn the water off when it’s just bubbling and stir the mixture gently until it’s combined.  Take it off the heat and allow to cool to room temperature.

Whisk the eggs and sugar together until light and frothy, then pour in the cooled chocolate/butter mixture, stir well, then add in the flour.  Stir briefly until the flour disappears.

Pour into a well-lined baking tin (I use a lasagne tin, but a square cake tin will do).  Bake for about 30 minutes or until the top is cracked and shiny.  The centre should still be slightly soft.  Serve warm or allow to cool and place in an airtight container

For the orangettes, choose a really dark chocolate – try Green & Black’s or Montezuma’s do a brilliant, rich Ecuador 70% dark chocolate that I’m just slightly addicted to.  Melt two or three squares in a tiny jug and just dip small pieces of Orangette into them.  If you have any trouble buying the orangettes (basically, candied orange peel – I got mine in my Good Fork hamper), you can make your own, or try Amazon (believe it or not).

These would be beautiful served at the end of a dinner party with the dark chocolate orangettes, little cups of very strong espresso coffee and maybe some freezing cold shot glasses of Cointreau too.

(Best get rid of the snow willies on the front lawn first, though).

So it’s bakeoff time again!  I wanted to do something around Valentine’s day, because you guys always bake the most amazing things, BUT I don’t want to limit you all to just heart-shaped things, oh no.  So our theme for this bakeoff is ‘baked with love‘.

If you’re not loved up, but just want to bake yourself a big mahoosive cake to eat in bed while watching a film, that’s fine too.  First, then, to the housekeeping:

The Rules

Because we’re rebels who ride with the wind in our hair and laugh in the face of danger (or something), the rules are few and far between, to be honest, but I know some of you love a rule or two, so just for you:

1. You’ve actually got to bake something – preferably connected to the theme (although see below re: sneaky rule breaking)

2. You must take a picture (you won’t get far with any of that ‘the dog ate it’ nonsense)

3. You must email it to me at english[dot]towers[at]gmail[dot]com, telling me what it is and who you are.  Entries must be received by midnight on the closing date, which is, of course, the day before Valentine’s Day, the 13th February.

The Cheaty Bit

As usual, a healthy bit of downright sneakiness is to be encouraged, and any entertaining reason why your entry  should be considered will be looked upon favourably.  For example, if your trifle is beautiful, but obviously not exactly baked, let me know.  I’m a flexible type and I’ll probably allow it.  No lying though.

BUT…

Okay, a bit of lying then, but not too much…

The Techy Bit

If you’re a blogger, please link back to this post, and if you’re a tweeter, please use the hashtag #madewithlovebakeoff . If you would like to display the ‘baked with love’ badge, you can download it from the links below. There are two sizes to choose from.

‘Baked with Love’ badge – 200px

‘Baked with Love’ badge – 150px

If  you’re neither, then just pretend this bit never happened.  Moving on, then… nothing to see here…

The Exciting Bit! (and the judgy bit – they’re combined this time)

That most wondrous and luscious of wine experts: the fragrant, and frankly fabulous Helen from Knackered Mothers’ Wine Club has very kindly agreed to be our judge.  Not only that, but she’s also offered to provide the winner with a bottle of pink fizz!!

Entries will be displayed in one enormous blog post and accompanied by the usual descent into hysteria while I get all hot and bothered about uploading and labels and all that other complicated stuff. Follow me on Twitter to witness the carnage in real-time hissy fit tweets as they happen.

The Small Printy Bit

As usual, all attempts at bribery and any dubious approaches must be made direct to the judge (hint: she likes wine) and not via this blog.   The judge’s decision is final.

This competition is open to all comers, regardless of location, although if you live in Outer Mongolia we might have a bit of trouble posting you a bottle of fizz, but hey, we’re triers so don’t let that stop you.   There is no cash alternative to the prize.

So that’s it, then.  You’ve got loads of time, plenty of inspiration, and some very ambiguous rules.  GO TO IT, TEAM!

So the weekend was somewhat traumatic.  I won’t fill you in on all the events, but needless to say being trapped in a packed train carriage all the way from Shepherds Bush while the three teenagers I was escorting serenaded their fellow commuters with loud renditions of My Horse is Amazing (seriously – don’t bother watching it, it’s that bad) and then being politely told that we were, in fact, accidentally in the first class carriage, shall remain with me for a long time and was one of the lesser traumatising events of the weekend.  Read out of that what you will.

Anyhoo.  In other news, I’m still on the lookout for a lovely breakfasty-type recipe that’s also quite healthy (I know, I know… giving up alcohol and vowing to eat healthily for the whole of January was a BIG HUGE MISTAKE – I have learned both that I could never be teetotal, and that I can’t live without cake) still, it’s nearly over now).  Yesterday I came across possibly one of the prettiest blogs I’ve ever seen: Eat Yourself Skinny.  It turns out that not only is the blog pretty, but the writer, Kelly, is ridiculously pretty as well.

So I thought, well.  If I eat what she eats, surely I’ll wake up looking exactly like her.

Right?

Oh.

Anyhoo, on to the trial and error.  I noticed that lovely Kelly’s blueberry and lemon bread was adapted from  Joy of Baking, so I went back to the original recipe to have a look.  Here’s my version.  I had to change it all from cups, and I decided to use rapeseed oil instead of butter (similar calories, just much better for you).  The result was yummy, although the inside of the cake was a bit too stodgy, presumably because beating the butter and sugar together introduces air into the mixture.  So I say stick with butter (the calories are the same).  I will say, though, that cutting it into the recommended 12 portions proved to be too much of a challenge.  Still, if you do manage it, you’ll be pleased to know that it’s just 159 calories a slice (might be better to cut it into 6 slices, then cut each in half). I also used a sugar substitute to keep the calories down (I know, I know, but honestly you can’t taste the difference).  Lastly, I used a whole punnet of blueberries which is a bit too much.  Stick to 150g.

You will need:

80g butter

6 tbsp granulated sugar substitute (try the new Truvia one – I haven’t been able to get hold of it yet)

2 eggs

1/2 tsp vanilla extract

Zest of 1 lemon

225g self raising flour

125ml milk

So preheat the oven to 180/gas 4 and spray a loaf tin with cake release (or butter it very lightly).

Beat the butter in a mixer (or by hand if you’re feeling butch), then add the sugar and beat until the mixture’s really light and fluffy.  Add the eggs, beating between each addition, and then the vanilla extract and lemon zest.

Stir in the flour and then the milk.  Finally, stir in the blueberries

Pop the mixture into the loaf tin and bake for about 50 minutes.  Pop a knife tip into the centre to check that it’s done, otherwise leave for a bit longer.

Allow it to cool before slicing into your minute portions.  It really is surprisingly lush though – and the blueberries make it quite jammy and sticky too.  Top tip: freeze your slices (with a piece of greaseproof paper between each one). Then they’re easy to pop into the toaster for a quick and healthy breakfast.

Moving swiftly on from healthy eating, then, we must remember there are those of us at English Towers (the gangly, floppy haired ones and the skatery types) that still want a little something after school or dinner and demand treats, preferably piled up in an ungainly, chocolatey tower when doing A level revision.

This, and I don’t say this lightly, is my best chocolate brownie recipe ever.  I make it such a lot that I know it off by heart.  Oh yes, it’s been tweaked and added to (pistachios, chopped up Cadbury Fudge bars, rum-soaked raisins), but the plain old dark chocolate version is the one we love.  I also have to make this whenever the Death Wish Dude’s lovely mate, George, comes to visit as he’s a bit of a fan.  You’ll need:

200g dark chocolate (I swear by Bournville – already in a handy 200g size, dark but not too bitter)

170g salted butter (MUST be salted – or add a pinch if using unsalted)

3 eggs

200g soft brown sugar (caster is fine if you don’t have any)

110g plain flour

Preheat the oven to gas 4/180 degrees.

Melt the butter and chocolate in a bain-marie (you know the drill… bowl over a saucepan of just-simmering water – don’t let the bottom of the bowl come into contact with water).  Turn the water off when it’s just bubbling and stir the mixture gently until it’s combined.  Take it off the heat and allow to cool to room temperature.

Whisk the eggs and sugar together until light and frothy, then pour in the cooled chocolate/butter mixture, stir well, then add in the flour and any extras you’re adding (nuts… raisins… smarties… whatever).  Stir briefly until the flour disappears.

Pour into a well-lined baking tin (I use a lasagne tin, but a square cake tin will do).  Bake for about 30 minutes or until the top is cracked and shiny.  The centre should still be slightly soft.  Serve warm with ice cream (or if you’re serving as a dessert, whisk some cream with a bit of icing sugar and a slug of booze) or allow to cool and place in an airtight container

One word of warning: cut them small.  They won’t last long.

Did you watch the Sport Relief version of the Great British Bakeoff? I was actually quite struck by how, if you don’t cook much, it’s actually quite difficult to get your head around it (case in point: Arlene Phillips not knowing that you had to line a pastry-filled tart tin before pouring in the baking beans). The same goes for healthy eating, really – if you want to move away from chucking a pizza in the oven when you get home from work, but have no clue how to do it, where on earth do you start?

This thought occurred to me again when I was approached by hellofresh.co.uk. They offer a delivery service with a difference – they basically deliver all the ingredients PLUS a recipe that’s easy to follow, taking all the hard work and guess work out of it. I was quite impressed. Tell me more, I said to Caitlin.

So first you pop to their website – tell them how many there are in the household and choose how many meals you want, and they do the rest. They do all the shopping, and it appears at your door on a Monday evening between 5 and 9pm with recipes, all ready to go.  All the meals area easy to do and take under 30 minutes to prepare, with no fancy schmancy cheffy tools required.

The sample recipe was, I have to say, very impressive: a chicken breast with creamy rocket risotto and tomatoes for 2 people:

Okay so not exactly science… just baking jiggery pokery really.

First, can I say that I’m not a fan of processed low-fat ANYTHING.  If I’m going to spread butter on my bread it’s going to be butter (Yeo Valley out of preference), and nothing remotely low-fatty or weirdly whipped with water.

Still, it’s the New Year and while I love my cakey buns, I’m determined to shed a few Christmas pounds, and when you’re healthy eating, sometimes the worst thing to get over is a craving for something sweet.  A banana or handful of raisins will often do the trick, but let’s face it, you can’t beat cake.  The worst thing about cake is, well, everything really – fat, sugar and refined white flour are possibly the things that most of us are trying to avoid.

Enter stage left, the well-loved but often under-appreciated Mr Muffin.  He’s smaller, more portable and, in lower-fat baking terms, easier to keep moist.  Bless him.

So what’s the difference between a muffin and a cupcake (or fairy cake)?  Well, I’d say a muffin is more breakfasty and bready, and a cupcake is more, well, cakey.  Also I find that muffin recipes tend to contain oil, while cupcakes are more buttery, and more often than not are iced too.  But hey, a cake is a cake is a cake, right?  HOWEVER.  There are substitutes you can make in baking, and it IS possible to make a healthier version.  So let’s attack these babies one at a time, shall we?

FAT

Fat plays an important part in a cake recipe.  Butter, for a start, adds flavour, but more than that (and without getting too technical) it’s essential for lightness, as it plays a part in holding the air bubbles you’ve produced (by whisking the eggs and adding stuff like baking powder) and keeps the cake soft by ‘wrapping’ itself around the protein in the flour.

So. You can’t get rid of it completely, therefore use it wisely and make sure the fat you do use is good for you.  Rapeseed oil is excellent (I’ve talked about it before here).  You can, however, cut it down and replace some of it with other moist ingredients like fruit (apple purée or mashed banana, prunes, squished peaches…) or low-fat dairy like yoghurt and creme fraiche.  Yes, you’ll reduce the lightness a little bit, but you can get away with it.

SUGAR

Sugar obviously adds flavour (and again, without getting too technical, it inhibits gluten development, which, when allowed to run rampant can make cakes and biscuits a bit hard) and it also helps with browning.  If you’re using fruit as a substitute fat, this can help with sweetness too, and it can help with browning as cutting down sugar can sometimes make cakes look a bit insipid.  Honey can help here as it’s much better for us and has natural sweetness.

REFINED FLOUR

If you’re reducing fat and sugar, you’re going to give yourself the problem of toughness (remember the protein ‘wrapping’ and gluten development I mentioned above?  This is why an awful lot of low-fat foods have TONS of sugar in – it’s not just flavour, it’s about a tender end result as well).  So what else can we do?  Well, we can reduce the gluten in the first place, by replacing some of it with things like oats, which are much lower in gluten-producing proteins.  You can also experiment with low-gluten flours like rye flour.  Wholemeal flour is obviously a healthier option too and should contain less gluten (although I’m being cautious here, as this isn’t always the case).

Other tips for low-fat baking:

So now I’ve bored you to death with all this talk of gluten and ‘wrapping’, here are a couple of other things to consider:

Experiment.  You might love a recipe made with peach purée but hate mashed banana.  You might find that a recipe is too tough, but taking away a little flour and adding another handful of oats can make a terrific difference.  Have a play.  The only thing you’ll lose is the odd cake or batch of muffins (which will probably still be nice enough to eat anyway).

Try just cutting the fat down on a normal recipe.  You can often eliminate a third or even half the amount of butter without doing that much damage to the finished cake (trust me).

Lessen cooking times to retain moisture – with lower fat baking, you might find your cakes need less time in the oven.  This is often why muffins are better than cakes – they require much less oven time.

Remember the GMR.  The Golden Muffin Rule is most applicable when healthy baking – stir ONLY as much as necessary.  Working the mixture will develop the gluten and toughen up your end result.

If you find your recipe is a bit dense, try beating the egg whites and folding them into the mixture.

And finally, DON’T ever bother cooking with low-fat butter or margarine type thingies.  They are the spawn of the devil and should be avoided at all costs. Bleurgh.

So here’s my recipe for healthier muffins.  They’re not sweet, delicate little cupcakes, but for a healthy breakfast, they’re pretty unbeatable.  Try stirring through a handful of blueberries or some raisins too:

Banana, oat and honey healthy muffins

So…preheat your oven to gas 4/180.  Pop paper cases into a 12 hole muffin tin.

First combine your wet ingredients:

1 large egg

120g low fat yoghurt

120g milk

2 tablespoons rapeseed oil

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 large or 2 small bananas, mashed

1 or 2 tbsp honey

Then get all the dry ingredients ready in another bowl:

50g porridge oats

100g golden caster sugar

60g wholemeal flour

150g plain flour

1 tsp bicarbonate of soda

1 tsp baking powder

Now, bung the wet into the dry and quickly combine with a fork (remember the GMR – don’t worry if there’s the odd bit of flour left).  Pop a tablespoon of mixture into each muffin case and get them into the oven quickly.

Bake for 15 – 20 minutes (remember, the moister the better).  They won’t keep more than a day or two (in an airtight tin), but they’re a great healthy breakfast or sweet treat to keep you on the straight and narrow, or to shut the kids up when they’re after cakeage and you don’t want them rolling around like fat little barrels.  Oops, a bit non-PC there. Sorry.

A word of warning here, though, if you eat all 12 with three cups of tea, then possibly the ‘healthy’ tag doesn’t apply.

Just saying.

So after all my moany, whiny protestations, English Dad actually DID buy me underwear for Christmas (sorry, lonnnnjjjjherrrieeee, you have to say it right).  It was very pretty, not too thongy, and actually really nice.

I tried it on.

In front of him.

There was some levering.  Actually, there was quite a lot of levering.  And a bit of sweating.  And a bit of unsightly overspill.  Quite a lot, if I’m honest.

Me: ‘Oh’.

Hubby: ‘They don’t fit? *panicked expression*, but they’re a size 12!  You’re a size 12!  You’ve always been a size 12!’

Me: ‘They don’t.  I am.  I have.’

Me: ‘Shit’.

And lo, the dawning was slow and painful.

I’ve got a bit porky.

It’s not my fault.  I like a gin, admittedly.  A gin or three.  And fizz! Who doesn’t, right? And a restaurant.  Oh I love a restaurant.  And I like a cake.  And a pie.  Oh and those crispy covered peanut things.  And a Topic.  And I’m an advocate of any problem being solved with a big stew and lots of mashed potato…

Okay so wait.  It IS my fault.

And so I decided, rather than take the rather lush underwear back, I would embark on a small period of healthy eating and gin avoidance thus rendering me back in a size 12 and able to wear my new pants.

Easy, right?

Well, no.  But I thought I’d help out by publishing a few healthy recipes over the next few days to start us off in the right direction.  Then we can get back on the gin and forget this ever happened.

Probably a bit late with this one, but as I was making my stuffing this morning I made a few tweaks to my last recipe and thought you might like it – apologies if yours is already shopped for and made!  We like a lot of stuffing and this quantity will fill a decent-sized terrine with a little left over, which I roll into little balls and bake separately, but feel free to halve it if there’s only a few of you.

You will need:

1 -2 tbsp butter

2 red onions, finely chopped

2 dessert apples, grated (don’t bother to peel)

2 x 375g packs pork sausage meat

100g fresh white breadcrumbs

100g vac packed chestnuts, crumbled (we’re a family divided over chestnuts – if you love them, add the whole pack)

2 tbsp parsley, chopped

2 tbsp thyme, chopped

2 tbsp sage, chopped

Squeeze of lemon juice

Seasoning to taste

So heat the butter in the frying pan and add in the onion.  Fry very gently until softened.  Add in the apple and cook that just until it’s a bit darker in colour and softened.

Remove from the heat and allow to cool. I make the stuffing in the KitchenAid but if you’re doing it without one I suggest you just get your hands in there – it’s the easiest way to combine everything.

So now just bung it all together: the cooled onion and apple mixture, the sausage meat, breadcrumbs, crumbled chestnuts, herbs and lemon juice, and give it a good old mix.

Season well (you can fry a teaspoon of mixture if you want to check the seasoning). Transfer to your buttered terrine and store, covered with cling film, in the fridge until the big day.  It’ll take about half an hour in the oven at about 190/gas 5 (180 if you’ve got a fan oven). Obviously it looks a bit more appetising when it’s cooked, but I’m not cooking it until tomorrow.

This also makes a very nice stuffing for ravioli if you happen to get a pasta machine for Christmas!

So yes you can rush out and buy a jar of cranberry sauce, but it’s equally easy to rush out and buy  pack of cranberries, and this yummy sauce will not only adorn your Christmas plate with its gorgeousness, but also scent your home so delightfully it could put Yankee Candles to shame. You can use all port if you haven’t got any Cointreau (English Dad got a bit sniffy about me using his posh Taylor’s, hence the addition of Cointreau), but it does give a nice orangey zing.

You will need:

1 pack cranberries (or you can use frozen) – about 250g should do it

100g brown sugar

1 orange, zested then juiced

1 cinnamon stick

120ml port

60ml Cointreau (or other orange liqueur)

A pinch of dried chilli flakes

Just pop all the ingredients into a saucepan:

… and simmer away for about 20 minutes.  Remember that cranberries have VERY high pectin, so even if you think it’s not thick enough, take it off the heat as it will thicken up as it cools.  Don’t forget to fish out the cinnamon stick.

Pour into a sterilised jam jar (dishwasher cycle or a good wash up and a thorough drenching with boiling water) and pop on a lid (it should just about fill one jar).  And that’s it!  Make double and give as a present, or just use yourself on Christmas day.