Note to self: dogs and empty houses? Uh uh.
Back live! Hope you’ve all missed my inane ramblings. We had a lovely time in England – saw all the family and had a fab trip up to London (details to follow). One thing that was slightly ominous while we were there, though, was a text from D. All his texts had been ‘dog fine, stop asking’, ‘been for a walk, he’s grand’, etc, but then I received one that said : ‘Been trying to ring. Dog fine but couple of toilet accidents and he has damaged window sill in hallway (badly). Wood can be replaced don’t stress’
Stress? Me? Nooooooo. The dog’s just eating my house and I’m in a different country. What else can possibly go wrong? Well, lots apparently. D then locked him in the kitchen thinking he’d contain the damage but oh no. Bert started on the wall next to the back door:
And then the utility room door:
And then my lovely bar stools:
And then the back door itself:
And this was the window ledge – not sure if you can see but he’s actually completely broken the corner off too:
I’m completely dumbfounded to be honest. He’s never so much as chewed a shoe before – yes okay so he’s nicked the odd bar of chocolate we left lying around, but this? Apparently he was absolutely fine for the first four days, then D and the gang started to hear him crying in the house and no matter how much time they spend with him, every time they left him alone he did more damage. And poor Lou – however grown up she is, it’s not fun to have to clear up a big dog poo that Bert generously left her on the landing carpet. He’s never ever messed in the house either. All I can put it down to is stress. It’s my own fault – Hubby decided to join us at the last minute and I thought Jen would have Bert, and then when she couldn’t, it turned out that his innoculations had lapsed and I couldn’t get him into kennels. D, Lou and Little C did me a great favour saying that they’d look after him, come in four or five times a day, take him for long walks, etc, but he just obviously couldn’t cope with the nights on his own.
I’m not cross. Actually I feel really guilty. Poor Bert, he didn’t know what to do when we came home – he was crying with excitement at the same time as shying away from us as he knew he’d done something wrong. I wonder what the hell my house insurer is going to say about this little mess.
33 Responses to “Note to self: dogs and empty houses? Uh uh.”
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We cannot leave our dog alone ever, he eats everything.
However only the dog is important, everything else can be mended/replaced/ignored.
XX
On another note, why didn’t you tell us all you were coming to London – we could have had a mini blog meet!
Tara: He’s a terrible tart as you know, likes to follow us all around and I guess the isolation was just too much :0(
Lulu: Well, we only came up to do the eye and the boat thing. SO many people though – loved Covent Garden as well, would like to spend much more time there. Next time maybe? x
Our dog used to do the same thing when she was a puppy … wood, plaster, candles, frozen mince, shoes and the odd pomegranite.
Sheer stress of being without you.
Welcome back by the way
Laura: Really? Isn’t it strange that it’s never happened before tho? He’s spent the weekend with D looking after him before too – maybe a whole 6 days was just too much…
And thanks – nice to be back too! x
TM: Aw that’s so kind thank you. Yes I think next time I’ll bring him – mind you did you see the kennels in the car decks on the ferry? He’d freak!!
Ma: Yup, it’s either that or kennels. I couldn’t bring him to yours as you’re right, he’d definitely eat the poor Ginger Ninja :0)
Jenn: Aw the poor thing – I know what you mean – apparently they could hear him crying from next door – and they’re a good couple of hundred metres away. I feel so awful for him, he must have been terrified x
Baino: Yup I’d certainly swap your scrumpled pillow! They are strange creatures – they seem to get terrifically attached, which is weird when you think they’re usually asleep and pretending we don’t exist!!
No major harm done… he’ll cope, and has probably forgotten about it already …
Moon: Exactly. He’s already developed that ‘oh bugger off and leave me alone’ sigh every time you give him a cuddle again. He did wag his tail – twice – when I produced the lead and suggested a walk. He never was very demonstrative!!
I feel a terrible shit about all this. We’ll be moced out of Pa-In-Laws soon, Missus and will host the naughty boy for future trips. X
WHAT did the insurer say?
Jen: Ah don’t be silly. It’s not your fault – you’re lodging with your Pa-in-law for heaven’s sake! Insurer arranged to send round an assessor (when she finally stopped laughing x
Meanwhile, our poor ‘son’ is at the kennel (we call it Dog Camp but he doesn’t buy into it) and our welcome is often the same: much crying and slinking and then all-picture-no-sound while he works on forgiveness.
Dogs!
Greyhounds you say ? Indeed, I have been there and done all that…plus +++…
My first of four wives and me were wedding gifted with a two year old racing failure by the chef in the Denver hotel where my brides father had a drugstore. Red Pam, she was named which of course became just plain, Pam. That bitch became a never ending source of irritation.The BS started to happen on our honeymoon to Guymas Mexico. We stopped for gas in Truth or Consequences New Mexico and let her out to pee. Mistake # ! From one am till dawn we searched the alleys of the town, following the trail of tipped over trash barrels she had left in her wake.
Returning to the car from our hike through the underbelly of T & C New Mexico, pissed and resolute that she was now the property, er, free spirit of their community, we found her curled up under the door of the T-Bird. BITCH !
We crossed the border into Arizona after sunrise. They’er were clouds behind us, above us and looking down the long valley south of Benson we saw five rainbows splayed cross the sky…what an omen, what a sight for eyes sore from driving.Even Pam woke up from her reverie to see what we were so excited about.
She was pretty cool in Mexico an Las Vegas, where we left her in the room while we joined the in-laws for dinner and a night at the blackjack tables. So we had to pay for the shreaded bed comforter and drape, but they missed the deep scratches on the back of the door and we did not mention it on checking out.
Back in Denver we had moved into a cute little bungalow on a ranch outside of Denver proper. It had a large fenced yard where Pam could run and play but on the second day she jumped the fence and proceeded to annilate the ranchers wifes chickens, 14 to be exact. It was the dog or us, somebodys got to go..so we moved.
As we moved between Colorado, California, Arizona and New York City she became a pretty cool Cookie. (which too was the wifes name) While she was a bitch in Colorado she was cool in California, lathargic in Arizona and in love with New York City where we walked at sunrise on the Brooklyn Bridge and took runs on the Strawberry Fields in Central Park.
Now to address the question of what to do to mellow out a hyper active Mutt. What worked best for us was to blow cannibus smoke into her warm, wet black nose and go about our business. As medicine for her it also worked for us as the stress you spoke of was mitigated by the inhailation of the herb by ourselves. After all, tis but a weed that turns to flowers in the mind.
I do love critters but love them in the wild. Coyotes, foxes, skunks and squirrels abound on this Arizona desert and we all get along just fine. The burros and cows may break through the fences now and then and the javalena’s (wild pigs) may come and root up the garden and the fruits in the grove but we are grateful for their passing through and can afford them their chew.
Someday before our passing I too would love to come to Erie and stand on the hills overlooking Galway Bay where me mother came from, drink a few pints with a Jamisons chaser at O’Conners Pub in Ballyforan and talk shite with the locals, enjoy some lilting Irish laughter and practice me brough.
Ah, tis nice to have a dream on a Sunday morning before its one hundred and thirteen in the shade in Phoenix, Arizona.
Time for a swim, looking foward to more of your greyhound adventurers..Later…
Thank you Dear Kate for your post, it did snap me back to another time and place, reminded me of how much we owe to the gods, er, dogs we have shared our lives with..Pam will now become a few pages in our memoir and we will give thanks to you for reminding us.
With best wishes,
Robert Whalen Gately
cowboysonmars.com
RWG
Robert: Welcome! Your story made me laugh out loud – a greyhound in a Las Vegas hotel?! Hope you won on the blackjack to make up for paying for all that damage! Not sure I’d advocate the cannabis up the nose trick, but I could see it might chill him out a bit!! Lovely to have you along.
PS: I’m not Kate though!! You’ll find her at http://www.iramble.co.uk where she’s having just as much fun with her lanky retiree! x
He must have been sooo stressed to bite the metal door handle like that!! Wood, I can understand because chewing is stress-reduction for dogs, but to chew metal they have to be out of their heads with it. I guess D wasn’t to know that confining him was going to make him worse.
Reminds me of the time our first dog shut himself in the bathroom while we were out. Poop everywhere. And I mean, ‘everywhere’ … but at least he hadn’t chewed anything.
I hope he’s OK now. I missed this post somehow!
I also hope Sid isn’t going to do this. *Insert extremely apprehensive look*
Towny: Blimey. Wonder if Gucci do XXXXXXXL? LOL!
Jay: I know – and I can’t believe he didn’t hurt his mouth either. Sid’s absolutely adorable by the way – we used to have a 3 legged cat!! x
[...] I won’t lie to you. I’m not loving Bert at the moment I think it all started with him eating the house while we were away. I have this theory that because he did all that damage and nobody was there to tell him off (well, [...]