Frosty (and skiddy)
It was beautiful here this weekend. Minus 4.5 degrees and the frost was so… er…frosty it was almost like everything was covered in white fur. Driving to pick #2 up from a friend’s in Mullingar, though, I lost the back end of the jeep in spectacular fashion and ended up in a ditch. Nothing dented except my pride, luckily.
Conclusion: frost is lovely if you’re indoors.
Bert: Cavan’s next top model
Much excitement today then – there was a lady postie today (she’s afraid of Bert, even though he’s inside, so I saw her spy him through the window, chuck the parcel at the front door, then run back to her van… chicken). The parcel had so many stamps on it, I couldn’t quite believe my eyes. I was even more amazed when I saw that it had come from Australia. The contents, though, had us in stitches, in hysterics and in tears – all at once!
Let me explain. The contents were for Bert, from my friend, the amazingly clever Coastal Aussie – the best, most exciting pressie I’ll open this Christmas by a country mile. First up, we have Bert’s inside coat (well, he’s a bit skinny and he gets very chilly), complete with polo neck and little holes for his legs:
This was followed by a really trendy, thicker outdoor coat, with a gorgeous skull design on the back (‘corrr, it’s got a skull on it Mum… deadly!!!;), complete with matching ‘snood’:
Bert loved both of them and had to be restrained from disappearing to his bed and curling up for a snooze (they were obviously comfy) before the photoshoot was finished. And before anyone starts whining on about people dressing up their dogs – these are COATS, people, not outfits. They serve a serious purpose and took Aussie an awful lot of time and effort. So what can I say. What an absolutely, wonderfully, thoughtful and kind thing to do. Thank you, Aussie, you’re an absolute star xxx
The Friday photo: Pampered? Moi?
So I was halfway down the boat road yesterday and a lady drove down the road beside me. Now it’s quite a small single track lane, so as usual I hurled myself into the grass verge, dragging a reluctant Bert with me, to let her pass. She slowed down to stop and have a chat. This happens quite a lot – it’s a sociable place, and Hubby and I often pass the time of day with people as they pass by. This lady, though, really made me smile. She wound down the window, gave me a lovely smile, then turned to Bert.
‘Having a nice walk?’, she said to him, ‘it’s a beautiful day’.
Bert did that silly wag, that not only circles his skinny tail, but wags his whole body too, flattened his ears to his head and leant forward to lick her hand.
‘You’re beautiful’, she said. ‘I often pass you on the boat road and think what a lovely boy you are’.
Bert wagged harder, licked her hand a bit more, and strained against the lead to try to get to her face so her could give her a nice wash. I concentrated on keeping him from jumping up and scratching her paintwork with his nails.
She ruffled his ears, stroked his (very soft) head, and added ‘I bet you’re pampered, you’re in very good condition’.
Bert, who was happily getting his left ear scritched, agreed with this wholeheartedly.
‘Well, have a nice walk then!’, the nice lady called out as she drove off.
As I walked home, I reflected on a place where someone will stop, have an entire conversation with your dog, then move off with a cheery wave, and it doesn’t even seem weird.
English Mum’s cheaty Limoncello – a step by step guide
Righty ho, then. Here we go with the promised Limoncello recipe. Firstly a little note about the alcohol. Seeing as we’re cheating (see title), there are no rules. I know that some people make this Limoncello with Grappa, or Schnapps, or one of those colourless fruity brandy-type drinks called Eau de Vie. Any of these is fine.
Anyhoo, it’s dead easy. I’ve even enlisted José Mourinho Hubby to photograph a little step by step guide (note how much better the photos are than my usual ham-fisted efforts). Firstly, you’ll need:
6 beautiful, fat fresh lemons, unwaxed or scrubbed in hot soapy water then rinsed well
200ml water
200g caster sugar
70cl bottle of Vodka or your alcohol of choice
Some sort of glass container with lid (I used one of those Kilner jars)
Step 1: peel the zest off the lemons with a peeler. Try not to push the peeler too hard otherwise you’ll get too much of the bitter pith with your peel.
Step 2: juice them all, and set aside with the zest.
Step 3: put the sugar and water in a saucepan and bring to the boil, then bubble away for a few minutes until it looks thicker and a bit syrupy. Notice that I cleaned my hob especially for you. Flattered?
Step 4: bung in the juice and zest, give it a stir, then slosh in the entire bottle of Vodka.
Step 5: pour the whole shooting match into some kind of bottle or even jars, as long as they’re sterilised, put on the lid and leave somewhere cool and dark until Chrimbo, when all you have to do is strain it, put it into a bottle and shove it in the freezer ready to play ‘Truth or Dare’ or some other juvenile party game that involves the winner taking a shot. All photographic evidence gratefully received. Erm… or you could be all civilised and Italianish Italianate Italiany Italianesque do like Italians do, and drink it with biscotti – the recipe for which I shall produce for you, as if by magic, shortly.
Let it snow and Limoncello (ooh that rhymes)
Oh the weather outside is frightful,
But the fire is so delightful,
And since we’ve no place to go,
Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!
So okay, I kind of promised myself that I wouldn’t do anything vaguely Christmassy (apart from talk about shopping, natch) until 1st December, but I’m thinking that this beautiful e-snow (thanks a-plenty to our resident internerd, Grandad!) is more wintery than actually Christmassy, so it’s okay.
Just a heads-up, this week at English Towers we will be mostly making… Limoncello! (takes a month to get gorgeous, so we need to get going) and biscotti (which don’t need to be made in advance, but I want to fiddle with the recipe so it’s perfect to serve with the Limoncello at Christmas). So get thee to SuperValu (or wherever) and pick up 6 of the biggest, fattest, glossiest lemons and a 70cl bottle of any-old-brand vodka in anticipation. Oh and if you happen upon some kind of really decorative bottle, maybe with one of those Grolsch-type swing-top corks, so much the better. (See what I did there? Drawing you in with a tantalising little snippet of things to come). It’ll be worth it, I promise.
30 days to go, people!!
The Friday Photo: it’s that time again! (quick Bert, hide)
Okay, so my camera’s knackered and anyway, I’m a busy little recipe testing beaver this week, but I couldn’t resist giving you this little ‘blast from the past’ from last year when we plugged Bert into the mains. Greyhounds, eh? Entertaining, warm on a cold winter’s evening and always up for some ritual humiliation. Don’t ye just love them?
33 days to go! English Mum’s Annual Online Christmas Shopping Guide
UPDATE:
Here’s a new discovery from the lovely Jen:
Cox & Cox: Should be renamed Englishmumstuff.co.uk as it contains every lovely, Christmassy, sparkly, arty, craft, kitcheny gorgeous thing I love (Including snowflake cookie cutters – received today, thanks muchly Jen! xxx) and yes they deliver internationally. Make an order quick if for no other reason than because you’ll get a free copy of their droolworthy catalogue.
Oh, and there’s only 33 days to now. Aaarrrrghhhh!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
So there’s just 36 35 34 33 days until Christmas (I know, I know) and about this time last year, I provided you with my Online Shopping Awards – a warts and all guide to the best (and sometimes not so best) places to doing your shopping online. This year it’s bigger and better. So there’s no excuse for giving your loved one a tin of Heroes from Asda.
The big few are still in there pitching:
Amazon are okay for books, but they still won’t deliver games or toys to Ireland for some bloody insane reason.
Play.com is really good, with free delivery worldwide and the chance to try other traders on Playtrade, but make sure the product really is still good value once you’ve changed from £ into € – their exchange rate is ludicrous (especially seeing as it looks like it won’t be long before the £ and € get neck and neck)..
CD-Wow is another old favourite with free delivery. They have an Irish site too.
Ireland
Here’s a bit of credit where credit’s due. Last year, I moaned that Nextdirectory.ie had extortionate delivery charges, but this year they’ve dropped from €9.50 to €5. Bargain. The range is still nowhere near that of its UK cousin, Next.co.uk, but still, it’s a great site.
Kitchen Complements still gets my vote as one of the best sites for kitchen stuff. Delivery is worldwide and the price depends on the weight and destination – full details on their fantastic website.
Living Gifts is just such a beautiful website, sending beautiful foodie hampers containing artisan produced goodies: chocolates, cakes, puds and preserves along with hand made pottery, cookbooks… you name it, all delivered in hamper baskets with a small fresh flower bouquet and your greeting on a pretty gift card. The lovely Mary at Living Gifts especially recommended their Orla Kiely for Butlers selection of gourmet chocolates including salt, nutmeg and chilli, for chocolate lovers: ‘a feast for the senses!’ in a gorgeous keepsake box designed by Orla Kiely. Delivery to Ireland, the UK, Europe, Oz, and the US. Price depends on the weight and destination. Full details on their website.
The girls at Beaut highly recommend: Cloon Keen Atelier . They do the most beautifully packaged smellies, body care stuff and candles. Check out their wondrous Christmas Morning candle, containing vanilla, pipe tobacco (which always reminds me of Uncle D, Moon’s lovely Dad), clove and cinnamon. Yum scrum. Worldwide shipping. [Edit: and they're very friendly too - hello Maggie!]
UK
If you live in the UK, or have friends or family there that you need to send pressies to, John Lewis is, as always, difficult to beat tops this Christmas, with FREE delivery on everything. They do fantastic gift sets of perfumes and that sort of stuff, flowers, jewellery, luggage, electrical gadgets for the boys, clothes… you name it.
Couverture sells the most beautiful items for the home, plus great clothing and it even has a vintage section. Delivery is £5.95 in the UK. Overseas delivery can be arranged but you’d need to contact them for pricing.
Hotel Chocolat is recommended by the Disreputable One. One of their orders was lost en route to us here in Ireland and they sent a new batch without a single quibble and with a lovely letter of apology too. The original order then turned up and we were fair drowing in their beautiful chocolate. Delivery worldwide and they have a US site as well (hotelchocolat.com). Their Ultimate Chocolate Advent Calendar contains seriously grown-up chocolate – 40% & 50% high cocoa milk, white with cherries and dark with Valencia orange cast into beautiful Christmas figures
Back on the guide for the second year is Vintage Wine Gifts. I use this site loads. You can search by region, drink, age, whatever and then send your wine, champagne, port, spirits, etc in the UK for £5.99 a bottle (delivery for orders over £39.99 is free) and internationally for £19.99 a bottle. The bottles are shipped in beautiful silk-lined wooden boxes and you get to choose a delivery date too. I’ve never once had a problem with an order.
Last year, the lovely, friendly, nothing-is-too-much-trouble Phil at Kiss the Cook made gorgeous little aprons for my nephews and nieces, embroidered with things like ‘Domestic Goddess in Training’, and this year she’s making me a special English Mum apron. I love my ‘Chocolat!’ napkins too. Postage from just £1.75 in the UK. Worldwide orders no problem, either.
Have some fun with your photos at Moo.com as well. I ordered some thank you cards with Bert on – they always go down a storm. P&P is only about €5, and that’s anywhere in the world. Great site and their customer service is second to none.
So there you have it. Anyone else got any favourites to add? Oh, and sorry I’m not about much, I’m testing cake recipes and am off to grate a kilo of carrots for a carrot cake. Whoopee!
Vanishing sticky lemon muffins
So Friday night we went to see the new Bond movie, Quantum of Solace. It was really good. I’m loving these new Bonds – not just because of the eye candy that is Daniel Craig, but also the sheer beauty of the whole things: I love all the amazing locations… the flash cars… the beautiful girls. Ah, I’m a bit of a Bond fan, really.
Anyhoo – just before we left I made these sticky lemon muffins. They’re like a teeny version of my lemon cake – still my best and most reliable recipe ever. I left them on the hob to cool down and when we returned – yes you guessed it – they were all gone, cake cases et al. So yeah, I know, it’s STB (that’s English Towerese for self to blame). As Jen pointed out, leave muffins within reach of a lanky kleptomaniac with a carb habit, and you’re asking for trouble.
170g butter
170g caster sugar
3 eggs
1 lemon, juiced, zested and then chopped
170g self raising flour
For the glaze:
The leftover lemon
About 4 tbs water
2 tbs caster sugar
Preheat the oven to 180 degreees/gas 4. Put muffin cases into a muffin tin and set aside. Now cream the butter and sugar until it’s really light and fluffy. Squeeze in the lemon juice and zest, and then beat in the eggs one at a time, beating well after each addition. If it curdles, add a spoonful of your flour. When it’s all incorporated, gently stir in the flour and then spoon into the muffin tins – it’ll probably make about 10 – 12. Bake for about 15 – 20 minutes.
Meanwhile, chop up the lemon and put it in a saucepan with a few tablespoons of water and a couple of tablespoons of caster sugar. Bubble it away, mashing the lemon down into the liquid with a wooden spoon, until it reduces and forms a nice, sticky syrup. Chuck out the lemon chunks and any pips.
When the cakes come out of the oven, drizzle a spoonful of the lemon glaze over each muffin and place them – out of the way of evil, muffin-stealing greyhounds – to cool.
Honestly, though. I thought he couldn’t reach up as high as the hob. You live and learn. *Sigh*
The Friday Photo: hellfire and damnation
This big mess on the sofa is actually my boys (not the hairy one in the middle – that’s the dog). They’re actually watching TV, believe it or not. I love, love, love them. Yes, they drive me crackers; my head often rings with guitar riffs, ridiculous arguments, towel-flicking battles at bathtime and manic giggling sessions. But I tell you one thing: if anyone, anyone tried to hurt just one teeny hair on either of those little heads, I would fight. I would fight, scratch, kick, punch, bite and yes, possibly – no, definitely – kill to protect them.
With this in mind, then, I read about the death of 17 month old Baby P with nothing short of horror. I’ll let you decide whether you read the details as they are horrific, but basically this poor child was systematically tortured over many months by his mother’s partner and their lodger, while their mother not only stood by, but actually took part. By the time they finally murdered him in August last year (despite more than 60 visits by Haringey County Council Social Services), the poor little scrap had suffered more than 50 horrific injuries, including a broken back.
Terrible enough? Or what about the delightful mother of little Shannon Matthews, who is currently being tried for staging the little girl’s kidnap in order to make £50,000. The little girl was drugged and tied up for 24 days until Karen Matthews told police the address of the flat where she was being kept, information apparently given to her ‘by a clairvoyant’.
You know I don’t have much truck with religion, but if that bit about people burning for eternity in the fires of hell happens to be true, then I wish it, with every fibre of my being, for every parent that harms their child, or stands by and lets another person do it. Here endeth the lesson.
