ENGLISH MUM: never knowingly undercatered

15 Responses

1. Jennynib Says:
   April 25th, 2008 at 10:45 am

   WTF!!!!

   You’re putting a St. George on Bert?

   Ohnoyouisnt!

   The tricolour or naffin Missus.

   :I

2. Jennynib Says:
   April 25th, 2008 at 10:45 am

   FAB pic, by the way…

3. Jay Says:
   April 25th, 2008 at 11:34 am

   ROFL! Well, I is thoroughly English (apart from a drop of Scottish blood in my ancestry) so no problems here. Born in The Smoke, so I was.

   Do they make tricolour coats for greyhounds? If not, there’s a gap in the market for someone!

4. Thriftcriminal Says:
   April 25th, 2008 at 2:18 pm

   Errr, I’m scared of the picture on the right.

5. Jennynib Says:
   April 25th, 2008 at 4:32 pm

   Jay, GREYT idea! Can’t sew, though…

   Ah, Thrifty, although they ARE frankenboobs, I must admit that I would like to swap my prairiebosom for something a little less… prairie-like.

   When I was 18 (and still nada under a shirt) my brother told me that he heard that one could make ones bosoms grow by stimulating the area between - preferably with toilet paper. “Really!?” I gushed. “Well, look what it did for your arse!” he replied.

   True story.

6. Thriftcriminal Says:
   April 25th, 2008 at 5:48 pm

   Beauty is as beauty does EM, I’m sure you require no artificial enhancement.

7. englishmuminireland Says:
   April 25th, 2008 at 8:14 pm

   J: Bert currently has a black and white striped ‘Trap 6′ jacket to cut a dash in down the boat road. And the Tricolour? I’d probably get told I had no right to wear it - bein’ one of the P word and all (shhhh)!

   Thrifty: I know. I can’t help but think it’s such a shame. She’s quite a pretty girl and actually makes herself look like that on purpose? Weird. I suppose there are blokes that love that kind of thing…?

   J: Frankenboobs LOL!!!!!

   Yeah, I’m about a grapefruit meself, but often resort to the wondrous Wonderbra in times of cleavage necessity.

   Thrifty: Ah bless. Does the Wonderbra not count??

8. Thriftcriminal Says:
   April 25th, 2008 at 9:10 pm

   That clearly should have been directed at jennynib, I’m an idiot, apologies for the error. Wonderbras are very acceptable. I’ll get me coat.

9. Tara Says:
   April 25th, 2008 at 9:21 pm

   he would look stunning.

10. Jennynib Says:
    April 25th, 2008 at 10:22 pm

    Alas, one simply can’t make mountains out of molehills. Believe me, I’ve tried.

    One day, when I’m very drunk indeed, I’ll tell yiz all about losing my ‘chicken fillet’ and the work do where I was the only female member of staff.

    Not funny.

11. englishmuminireland Says:
    April 26th, 2008 at 8:57 am

    Thrifty: Yeh, thought that. She really is very pretty and doesn’t need giant knockers to complete the picture.

    Tara: I agree. I might have to get him a little coat wardrobe to impress (or scare off) the yapper down the lane.

    J: Ooh, do tell!

12. Jennynib Says:
    April 26th, 2008 at 2:12 pm

    Can’t. Would REALLY have to be jarred. It IS possible to die of embarrassment and after that awful night I got called ‘Titleist’ until I moved departments a year later.

    BTW, Titleist are a make of super flying golfball. Small, White and Airborne.

    The Horror.

13. englishmuminireland Says:
    April 26th, 2008 at 4:07 pm

    J: Ouch. I feel your pain xxx

14. Jennynib Says:
    April 26th, 2008 at 8:48 pm

    EM? Where’s the photo and recipe of The Greatest Pavlova On Earth (TM) you promised? Hmmmm?

15. englishmuminireland Says:
    April 27th, 2008 at 9:44 am

    Tis there! Patience, girl x

Leave a Comment